Year 2014…..
Bachpan se ek chote se gaanv me rehna wala humara hero Anup bahut hi siddha sada sa ladka jisey koi kuch bhi karne ko kahe to woh ankh bandh karke bas unki madad me lag jata, ab woh bada ho gaya tha hmesha gaanv k mahol me pala badha Anup ab 10th class pass kr chukka tha 11th class k liye usey gaanv se 35km dur ek shahar me padhne k liye jana, eke k karke usne apni packing shuru ki or subhi dosto se mil kar kareeb 100 logo ki toil aaj usey bus stop chodne aa aayi kyuni who pehle inshan tha us gaanv ka jo 10th k baad aage ki study karne jar aha tha or ho bhi kyun na gaanv me subka pyara jo tha woh,
Ab aage ki kahani shayad ap uski jubani hi sune to usey samjhne me apko ek pal bhi nahi lagega…
Subah 11 bze jo ek bus mere gaanv se Shehar jati thi usko aane me kuch hi waqt bach tha, dhadkne thodi tez thi kyunki aaj pehli baar me akele kahi ja raha tha, haan… maine kabhi gaanve se bahar akele ek kadam bhi nahi rakha hai ab tak, or thodi hi der me bus aa gyi or maine subko bye bola or bus me beth gaya, bus me bethe bethe kuch hi palo me purani zindagi ki tasveere ab dhire dhire gayab hone lagi jisme mera bachpan tha or ab me us bachpan se thoda aage zindagi k ek naye safar par nikal chukka tha or ye naye mahol me khud ko adjust karne k liye jaruri bhi tha, New school me dhire dhire me subse ghul mil sa gaya or sub kuch acha lagne laga, hostel k who dost or unki woh baate is par me jitna kahu utna kam hai, ek shabd du agar us pal ko to “jannat” se kam nahi hoga, me waqt par school jata or hostel aakr padhayi karta or fir so jata thoda dosto k sath bahar ghumta or night me sub sath me dinner krke fir so jaate,
Par ek din sub kuch badal jaane wala tha roj ki tarah class me notes likhte hue meri nazar table k corner me gayi to waha pen se kisi ne “Hi” likha tha or jaha tak mujhe yaad table new the or waha kal tak kuch nishan/kuch bhi likha hua nahi tha kaafi der sochne k baad jawab me maine bhi thik “Hi” k niche “Hello” likh diya,
Or next day thik “Hello” k niche likha hua tha “Mujhe nahi pata tha tum itna jaldi mere likhe ‘Hi’ ko notice karke reply kroge”
Or fir Roj kuch aise hi baaten hone lagi woh kon tha me nahi janta tha par ab hum table par aise hi kcuh likh kar baaten karne lage…..
From next day……
Tumhara naam? (She asked)
“Anup (I said)
Tumhara naam? (I asked)
“Anushka (She said)
“Sunno sawal sirf me puchugi or jo jawab dena jaruri hoga me tumhe de dugi, ab bas tum jo me roz yaha likh kar jau tum uska jawab dena sirf”
“Thik hai (I said)
Next 3 month tak hum aise hi table par likh likh kar baaten kar rahe the par ek din…
Table par likha tha “Maine tumhare liye ek letter table k niche chipkaya hua hai usey padh lena tumhare sare sawalo k jawab hai usme”
Letter – “Kaise ho Anup, ummid hai tum thik hoge, me Anushka class 9th me padhti hu humari class subah 7 se 12 bze tak first shift me rehti hai or me yahi table par beth ti hu, or mere pas tumhari class ki kuch photo hai jisme tum usi seat par bethe ho or mujhe tum ache lage to socha baat karu or fir mere shaitani dimag me yeh idea aaya, meri ek dost hai jo tumhari class me hi padhti hai usne hi pictures share kiye the mujhe, so ab pagal k jaise class me subko puchne mat lag jana ki kisne kisko pictures share kiye, or batao padhayi kaise chal rahi hai tumhari, mujhe to padhayi me bilkul maza nahi aata kash me tumhari class me hoti or tumhe dekh kar shayad me kuch pdhayi me dhyaan lagaati, tumhe ajeeb lag rha hoga na ? ki me itna kaise bol rahi hu or woh bhi bina jaane pehchane, woh is liye kyunki Anup tum mujhe bahut pasand ho or shayad yahi wajah hai maine tumse baat karna jaruri samjha or ek baar me hi dil ki saari baat bata di, or haan mere liye kuch likh kar jarur jana jaise maine tumhare liye ye letter choda waise hi tum mere liye kuch likh kar rakh dena”
Me lunch break me jaldi se school k ground me gya or waha ek chair par beth kar uske liye ek letter likha..
Letter – “Pehli baat to tum pagal ho ye sub karne se acha hum phone se message par baat kar sakte hai, or tumhari baaten mujhe kuch samajh me nahi aa rahi hai, thodi ajeeb ho”
Next day uska letter mila…
Letter – “Yarr tum to naraz ho gaye ho, me sirf itna kehna chahti hu ki me tumse pyar karne lagi hu tumhari har ek pal ki khabar hai mujhe, or mujhe maaf karna kyunki agar me tumhare samne bhi aaugi to tum mujhe nahi pehchan paoge, me tumhe apna number nhi de sakti, mujhe yeh acha lagega ki tum mujhe dhundho, or jab milo to me tumhari ankho me woh khushi dekhna chahti hu or tumhe meri kasam hai ki kabhi school me meri class me aaye ya chup kar mujhe dekha to ya register me meri photo bhi dekhne ka socha to, me chahti hu ki tum mujhe bheed me bhi dhundh lo bs ek ehsash k jariye, Anup apna khayal rakhna”
Reply me Maine thoda naraz hokr usey ek letter likha par shayad ab tak me bhi ussey pyar karne laga tha par ye baat Maine usey mehsoos nahi hone di thi par usey sub pata hota tha….
Letter – “Anushka me tumse naraz hu yeh kaisa pagalpan hai, ok me tumhe nahi dhundhuga jaisa tum bol rahi ho waise hi me tumhe dhundhuga par mujhe tumse pyar nahi hai or is ehshas k bina me tumhe mere aas paas hone par kaise mehsoos karuga”
Next day reply from anushka…
Letter – “Anup tum buddhu ho, tumhe yeh ehsash hai tum pyar me samjhte ho or shayad ab tum bhi mujhe pyar karne lage warna koi Kisi ki kasam itna nahi manta kabhi ka tod kar mere samne aa jata ab tak par tum meri har baat mante ho, or kuch bhi hai jo mujhe tumhe batana hai, mujhe maaf karna par meri zindagi me pyar ki matlab tumhari bahut jyada ehmiyat hai or mujhe tumhe sirf itna samjhana hai ki koi hai tumhara jo tumhara intezar kar rahi hai jo tumse pyar karti hai or woh chahti hai hai tum usey jaldu se dhundh kar uska intezar khatm kar do, or ye mera tumhare liye last letter hai, agar tum mujhe nahi dhundh pao to bhul kar aage badh jana par tut mat jana, ab me tumhe or preshan karna nahi chahti, jab bhi zindagi me koi esa pal aaye jab tum akele ho to ankhe bandh karke mujhe yaad karna haan mera chehra to tumhare samne nahi aayega par meri baate tumhara sath jarur degi, me tumhari thodi help kar sakti hu agr tum mujhe dhundhna chahte ho to, jab sub idhar idhar bhag rahe hoge tab koi dur 2 ankhe sirf tumhe dekh rahi hogi, tumhe bas mere samne aana hoga or ek baar dil se yaad karna tum mujhe pehchan jaoge, I love you Anup apna khayal rakhna, or jawab me mere liye ek last letter chod dena me tumhe or preshan nahi karna chahti, me chahti hu tum sirf meri baate yaad rakho agar hum nhi mil paaye kabhi, or haan meri ek wish puri kar dena, please padh kar ye saare letter aaj hi jala dena or promise karo ki tum mujhe dhundh loge meri bachpan se wish thi ki koi mujhe bin dekhe pyar kre or bs ek is umeed me mujhe dhundh le ki hum pyar karte hai bs, apna khayal rakhna buddhu”
Yeh letter Maine kareeb 100 baar padha hoga or jaisa ki uski wish thi mene subhi letters padh kar jala diye, ab bas uski nishani k naam par mere pas woh rakh bachi thi or uski kahi baaten, ankho me anshu or dil bhar aaya tha aaj shayd usey khone ka dart ha mujhe par maine jaise tese khud ko sambhala,
Jawab me Maine bhi usey last letter likha jaisa ki usne kaha tha promise dene me badi maheer h woh to me bhla kuch kar bhi nahi sakta tha par last letter me Maine woh sub kuch kaha Jo mere dil me tha…
Letter – “Anushka, me wada karta hu agar hum kabhi nahi bhi mil paaye to me humari in baato ki yaadon k sahare hamesha khush rahuga, or mera wada hai tumse me tumhe jarur dhundh luga, apna khayal rakhna or mera intezar karna me jaldi tumhe dhundh kr aa raha hu, par thoda dara hua bhi hu har roz me 12 bze school aa jata hu humari class se 2hours pehle taki me tumhe pehchan pau par aaj tak mujhe kisi ko dekh kr yeh mehsoos nahi hua ki yahi meri anushka hai”
Or aaj maine apne dil ki baat usey keh di thi or ab thoda dar bhi tha kahi baar socha kisi se puch lu ki anushka kon hai par uski kasme yaad aa jati thi or ab me bhi usey waise hi dhundhna chahta tha jaise woh chahti thi ki me usey dhundhu, waqt gujar raha tha or hum kabhi mil hi nahi paaye ab meri school bhi khatam hone ko thi last 2 months bache the or sub kuch kho jane dar dil se sambhala hi nahi raha tha,
2 month later
Aj school second last day tha bas iske baad mere exams hone wale the,
Aj hostel se niklte waqt meri aankhe anshuo se bhari hui thi ab mere liye khud sambhalna mumkeen nahi tha, isi tarah school pahucha or jo maine dekha shayad woh pal mujhe heela dene wala tha table par 3 words likhe hue the “Good bye…anup”
Me puri tarah darr gaya tha, ankho me anshu the or khada hona bhi muskil tha mere liye ab kuch nahi bacha tha mere pas par aaj jawab me maine pehli baar usey “I love you” kaha or ankho me anshu liye man hi man usey sorry bol raha tha ki me usey nahi dhundh pa raha hu,
Khud ko sambhal kar zindagi ka who subse muskil din maine nikala,
Tabhi class khatam hui or me apna bag lekar nikal gaya par pahuchte hi mujhe yaad aya meri ek note book table k drawer me hi reh gayi thi usme maine who sub baaten likhi hui thi jo aaj me yaha likh raha hu meri or anushka ki kahani, me school gate se vaps apni class ki taraf gaya or sub log nikal gye the school se, me bhag kar meri class me pahucha or…..
Ek ladki meri table par bethi thi or jab me thoda pas gaya to sub kuch tham sa gaya tha maano waqt ab ruk gaya tha puri school shant thi har koi chala gaya tha or jo meri ankho k samne tha woh dekh kar bas meri ankho me anshu ruk hi nahi rahe the me thik se khada bhi nahi ho pa raha tha, meri classmate “Rizwana shaikh” (Class topper or hmesha mera or uska competition rehta tha or woh har baar mujhe jyada marks lakr pehle mujhe chidati or fir mujhe congrats krti & next attempt me acha karne k liye good luch bhi wish karti) woh pen se kuch likh rahi thi jab me uske pas jake khada hua or maine uski taraf dekha uski ankho me anshu the jo table par geer rahe or usne table pr likha tha…
“Haan buddhu tum dhundh loge mujhe kishmat par yakeen or tum par yakeen hai”
Saanse ruk si gayi thi ek sunsan se school me jaha bs ab kuch teachers the or me us shakhs k samne tha jisko me paglo ki tarah dhundh raha tha, me khud ko sambhal hi nahi pa raha tha or ab pehli dafa usne meri or dekha uski aankhe anshuo se bhari hui laal ho chuki this, hath kaanp rahe the, uske hotho se mera naam nhi nikal raha tha, maine uske anshu ponche or me kuch bol pata usne mere muh par hath rakh diya or usne kaha badi muskil se usne kuch kaha mujhse…
“Buddhu akhir dhundh hi liya tumne mujhe apni anushka ko , mujhe yakeen tha tum aaoge mere liye, or rona bandh karo khush ho jao ab to tumhe tumhari anushka mil gayi hai”
Maine khud ko sambhala or uske anshu saaf kiye or usey kaha…
“Rizwana me nahi janta Maine kissey pyar kiya lekin mujhe us shaksh ki kahi har baat se pyar hai, or wah tum ho ab me tumhe anushka kahu ya rizwana pr mujhe yakeen tha hum milege or dekho aaj is notebook ne hume milaya hai jisme har panne par hum dono ki kahani hai, chlo bahar or kahi achi jagah jaake dher saari baaten krege”
Mere ye kehne par woh thoda dar gayi or usne kaha…
“Nahi anup ye kahani meri or tumhari nahi hai tumhari or anushka ki hai haan maine zindagi k subse haseen lamhe tumhare sath anushka ban kar jeeye hai or me unke sahare
puri zindagi gujar lugi, me tumhe rizwana ban kar kabhi pyar nahi kar paugi, me tumhare khayalo ki anushka ban kar hi jeena chahti hu or aaj hum last baar mil rahe ha”
Uski ye baat sunn kr me darr gaya tha or agle hi pal usne kuch aisa kaha jisne sub kuch badal diya…
“Hume anup or rizwana ban kar nahi anup or anushka ban kar jeena hai is pyar ko zinda rakhna hai fir chahe hum kabhi sath rahe ya na rahe me chahti hu ki hum is pal ko yaad karke aage ki zindagi gujare, kahi ek hone ki chahat me buri yaadon k sahare zindgi na gujre,”
Or itna keh kr woh mere gale se lag kr rone lag gyi or rote hue kehne lagi…..
“ab tum kuch nahi bologe anup, humara pyar samandar se bhi gehra hai or yeh jaruri nahi ki aage ki zindagi sath gujare, hum bas in palo ko yaad krke aage zindagi haseen banayege, sath nahi to kya hue ek dusre k dil me to rahege, or haan… agar tumhe gussa aaye to tum rizwana par gussa kar lena because woh tumse durr ho rahi hai tumhari anushka to hmesha tumhare dil me hai usey jab bhi yaad kroge or kabhi vaps dhundh kar milne nahi aaoge or jis din koi achi ladki mile jo tumhe har waqt jit te hue dekhna chahe ussey shadi kr lena”
Itna keh kar usne mujhe akhiri bar gale lagaya or rote hue door tak pahuchi or muskurate hue ek smile di or usne kaha…..
“Chalo samile kro ab or apna khayal rakhna buddhu humara sath rehna yahi tak tha par yeh pyar hmesha k liye zinda rahega”
Or ab mere chehre par khushi thi woh shaksh jisey me pagal ki tarah dhundh raha tha woh mujhe mil gaya tha, or jaate woh jaate mujhe yeh baat sikha gayi ki bs agar koi kisi se pyar kare to bas pyr ka hona jaruri hai zindagi me kahi durr se usey dekh kr mushkura do or har dua me uski khushi mango, kal aane wali har har muskil k liye usne mujhe himmt di or shayd usne sube badi baat yeh sikha di ki agar pyar hai to bas itna kaafi hai zindagi to kisi k sath hone se jyada yaadon k sahare or jyada khubdoorat lagti, is tarah usne is pyar ko amar kar diya.
Or us din maine usey last time dekha tha or ab chahat se jyada yaaden achi lagne lagi….